Nail biting, cold sweat, I feel like vomiting.
Am I just here to ride on?
Obsessing over someone’s hand
That keeps on slipping?
Away, Far, Okay?
My legs aren’t tied.
But my movements are limited.
To fight this magnetism,
Would mean I will have to amputate,
My limbs, myself, my being.
Should I do that?
I want to run away.
But these rusty nails on my feet,
Are persistently being hammered.
I unhooked one a while ago.
Three forcefully dropped from the heavens.
Causing my blood to squirt out!
They went deeper than the one I just removed!
My hands aren’t chained.
My mind is alert.
My eyes, ears, mouth are all free!
But my wholeness is vital!
I can’t leave my feet attached to the ground!
Those birds and butterflies,
They used to accompany me in this ordeal,
They just flew away.
Those bugs and snails,
They used to massage my legs in pain,
They crawled away!
I am broken.
I will always be!
Strings of rejection,
Am I hanging on to the delusion?
Trail of heart aches,
I am waiting until my sanity breaks.
I am waiting!