EMO MODE*** Sorry friends****

People around me just come and go, move on and out, in just a snap of my fingers. Why am I still here?

I’ve been working in the same place for 5 years already, meeting the same people, doing the same things and experiencing same good stuff and same craps, still, from the same people. Too bad that I don’t even know why am I still here.

It pains me to see friends go away and move on with their lives. Sometimes I ask myself, am I lonely because they’re going away or is it because I’m stuck here and they’re leaving me in this disposition?

Don’t get me wrong. Being able to work in a very rich, safe and stable country is a great blessing that I’d forever be grateful about. It’s just that, sometimes, I feel that I’m not at all inspired to work here. As much as I wanna go back to the Phil, the opportunities I can acquire here will never be available back home. It feels like I’m left with no choice….

No choice because I’ve never wanted to work outside the Phil before for the reason that I didn’t wanna go far away, thus not only distance but also time would be an obstacle for me and my loved ones. When I got accepted here, I felt so blessed because here’s just 3hrs away with no time difference from the Phil. Opportunities are extremely overflowing for my profession not only here but also in other western countries. But of course, my reasons for trying out here were ,again, distance and time. So I think, Singapore is already the best place for a single lady like me who fears being too far away from her loved ones. Thus, I feel that  I’ve no choice but to stay here.

Maybe I’m just a little bored and scared of my future because there seemed to be not much excitement happening in my life. Unlike all my friends here, some of them got married, had babies, relocated, went back for good.. major, life-changing decisions, which I’ve never had yet. I’m freakin’ bored with my life. I frequently ask the Lord what am I supposed to do? What does HE want me to do? I seriously have no idea. What is my purpose HERE?  Darn!

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Was supposed to do my foot spa and pedicure. I’ve totally forgotten about it when I started emoing….heheh